Needs a Title
Everywhere you go now, whether it’s in a grocery store, mall, movie theaters, and or a restaurant it seems that kids are acting out in worse behaviors than kids used to act years ago. I have conversations with other people regarding “how are these kids acting this way and how are they getting away with it?” I am a firm believer that it isn’t any new technology on why these kids are acting out worse nowadays, it is a lack of parenting. Some people may believe that “extreme parenting” is bad for children but I believe it can actually be good for them.
Ever since I was a little boy I always had my father on my back about things that I didn’t do and or should have done differently. If I talked to my mother and or sister a certain way I would have been grounded from playing video games and or my cell phone. Taking a kid’s cell phone away is the worst punishment you can give them. Throughout grade school I always had to strive for honoral. If I didn’t make honoral, again there would be consequences when I got home to show my father my report card. With my father being hard on me in life, and showing me valuable life lessons, I am extremely grateful for that because it made me the man I am today.
The word discipline comes from the latin word “discere” which means to “teach”. This is why parents show discipline in order for their child to learn what they did wrong and they shouldn’t do it again. By having discipline it can teach people many things. Extreme parenting can be different to many people. For instance, some people may believe that extreme parenting or “tough love” can just mean enforcing rules and showing discipline to their kids if they do something wrong. Other people may believe that extreme parenting and or “tough love” can mean that parents put their hands on the child. I can see both arguments whether people agree with both examples of extreme parenting or not. Personally I mostly agree with it unless if it turns into abuse then I don’t agree with it.
According to the article that I am reading, “productive use of tough love might entail emphasizing realistic consequences for actions.” For instance by this quote it means, if an older brother puts his hands on his younger sister a father of the two siblings may release a harsh punishment on his son due to his actions and the father may also put his hands on his son (even though the father doesn’t want to do that). By the father providing these consequences to his son due to the sons actions it will not only show him discipline but will also make him realize his actions were wrong and in the real world he will be met with similar consequences like getting charged and possibly going to jail for assault and if people in jail know what he did they would probably put their hands on the person. That is why parents discipline their children with consequences that meet the action of what their child pursued.
Another great example that parents use in the “tough love” parenting style is teaching their children the true value of a dollar and the differences between “wants and needs”. Parents can teach their children the true definition of a dollar by having them work for their money at a young age. For example, parents that give their children a monthly and or by weekly allowance by doing chores is great. This allows children to learn that they must clean up after themselves and will earn money in the process. Now if a child wants to buy something they will have to think long and hard whether that purchase is a “want or need”. Yes it is okay if people purchase what they would like to have in life sometimes but they shouldn’t do this all the time especially when they get into the real world when they have bills to pay such as car insurance, rent, utility bills, and food to buy.
“Tough love” can be a great parenting style for children. It will make kids more mentally strong as well I believe. With how involved our youth are in social media nowadays, “tough love” from parents will make kids more mentally strong and will be able to cope with things better than they see on social media platforms like Snapchat, Instagram, and or Facebook. There are so many children in today’s world that suffer from depression because of what they see on social media because their life may not look like someone on social media that the person is posting.
In Conclusion I believe that the parenting style of “tough love” is great for children if it’s not used in an abusive way. I plan on using “tough love” one day if I am lucky to have kids of my own. From my research “tough love” teaches kids responsibility, discipline, high self esteem, and to manage their aggression. I believe that this parenting style will teach the next generation not to be “too soft” which will be good for our country.
References
Team, B. E. (2023, October 16). What is tough love and can it be effective?. BetterHelp. https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/parenting/what-is-tough-love-and-can-it-be-effective/#:~:text=According%20to%20Merriam%20Webster%27s%20dictionary,parents%2C%20as%20it%20can%20mean
Counterintuitive Fall 2024 
You haven’t specified what sort of feedback you prefer, PeterGriffin, so I’m going to choose Argument. I’ll ignore the best I can everything but the claims you make and how persuasive they are. First, I’ll be hoping for a strong argument of any kind, but I’ll also be very happy if it turns out to be a good Definition or Categorical argument.
Paragraph 1.
The claim here is that kids are “acting out” more today than before. That may be true, but it may be irrelevant to your argument about “tough love” unless you think parenting styles have changed through the same years. If parental behavior is responsible for kids acting out, then you’ll have established an important causal relationship between, I don’t know, “soft love?” and undisciplined kids?
Consider using a simple phrase like Soft Love to contrast it with Tough Love as a way to sharpen your definition of “tough love.” You call it a “lack of parenting,” but that’s not helpful to your argument. Lack of parenting would mean not having kids, to me. Unless you’re more specific, you’ll be misunderstood.
Before you even get to the first explanation of “tough love,” you’ve added a new term, “extreme parenting,” but that’s already been taken by social critics who mean an obsessive, overbearing monitoring of every aspect of a child’s life. I presume that’s not what you RECOMMEND when you advocate for “tough love,” but I don’t know yet. You haven’t been clear.
Paragraph 2.
Your argument here is that your dad was “always on my back about things that I didn’t do and or should have done differently.” I’d say “on my back” is a better description of “extreme parenting” than of “tough love.” You might want to emphasize that there’s a “tough” aspect to tough love that is balanced by the “love” aspect of tough love. Without the love, you just have a needy dictator who wants things done his way.
The only research you cite is from a counseling service that wants to talk readers into spending money for a counselor. It’s not the best research by far, but the article does a fair job of indicating that showing concern for the child’s well-being in a constructive way is an important aspect of good parenting, whatever term we apply to it. Your paragraph emphasizes ONLY the penalty side of discipline and ignores the other way we use the word discipline: a regular program of taking actions that we know will benefit ourselves. Parents who manage to get their kids to INTERNALIZE discipline will find that the kids want to behave better to achieve better outcomes NOT JUST to avoid punishment. The tough/love combination needs both.
*Grammar Note: you mean “honor roll.”
Paragraph 3.
The “teaching” aspect of tough love is beneficial to you, but you mostly waste it, PeterGriffin. Teaching is demonstrating, not punishing. Teaching is helping kids see the benefits of good behavior, not just the pain of getting caught misbehaving. You again emphasize the discipline for “what they did wrong.”
The less time you spend describing what “other people’ think tough love means, the more time you can devote to what YOU DECLARE IT TO BE. This is YOUR Definition argument. You’re in charge of the meaning.
Paragraph 4
Again, your example is of a kid hitting a kid and getting hit in return. If that’s all tough love means in your 1000 words, you can understand why people might think your version of tough love gets dangerously close to abuse.
For that version of tough love to be really educational, the penalty for one adult assaulting another adult would be for the police to administer a righteous beating. We don’t condone that, and you wouldn’t want your kid to think that’s how love is shown by adults.
Paragraph 5
You’re the Author, so you really do get to declare what tough love is for 1000 words. If teaching kids the value of money by making them work for an allowance is part of the program, think of ways to incorporate “the value of work” and the benefits of budgeting, maybe. It’s not “an allowance” if you have to work for it; it’s pay for performance.
Your “want or need” observations are good, but they stretch the meaning of tough love farther than we thought you had defined it, so acknowledge that tough love is about more than Parental Discipline. It involves teaching kids to self-discipline.
Paragraph 6
It’s hard to see the relevance of your social media observations, PG. Maybe you mean a child who has internalized her own best interest and has achieved a healthy set of values will be less inclined to be jealous of what anybody else has. That sounds true to me, but you’ll have to connect it to tough love on your own.
Conclusion.
I’m missing something clearly. I don’t see how any claim you’ve made above would help a child achieve self-esteem or manage their own aggression. A child who is merely afraid to be punished probably feels deeply disrespected and angry. Repressing that anger may curtail violence, but it isn’t healthy and you wouldn’t want your kids to fear you only. You’d want to emphasize the love side of the phrase and help them behave well out of respect for themselves and others.
Helpful? I sure hope so. 🙂
Your Portfolio will have room for BOTH your Definition Argument (this post) and your Definition Rewrite. It’s essential that this post stay the way it is so that differences between this first draft and your final revised version will be obvious.
Without two very different versions to compare, you will fail to demonstrate how you incorporated feedback into the revision process which is the primary value of this course.
BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY REVISIONS:
1. Copy and paste the text of this post into a new post called Definition Rewrite—PeterGriffin.
2. Put that new post into two categories: Definition Rewrite and PeterGriffin.
3. THEN make revisions to the new post.
4. Put Definition Rewrite—PeterGriffin back into Feedback Please when you want a new grade for your improved version.
5. Repeat as often as you like.
OK? 🙂