2nd person – Maxxpayne

Posted on November 27, 2023 by maxxpayne
  1. Taxpayers wonder whether the amount spent on students makes a difference. If one really thinks about it, yes it does. Ask any parent whose child goes to an expensive school.
  2. There are different types of injuries that happen in each sport. Would there be any objection if it were known that a surgery performed before any injury occurs could make an athlete stronger?
  3. Imagine a body being consumed by a drug. Anything would be done to get this drug, and the consequences that come with it wouldn’t be worried about.
  4. By inviting Syrians in, more problems are caused than solved.
  5. Does the idea of not actually having money on hand sound trivial?
  6. That little green piece of paper in one’s pocket holds no actual value other than the cost it took to produce it, and yet a whole life is spent working just to acquire more of those little green pieces of paper, which can then be taken and stuck in a bank.
  7. So just remember the next time a bank statement is read or a dollar bill is looked at that an made-up value is being held. Without it, one might still be having to trade with goods like livestock and produce.
  8. I now understand that a dollar is only worth what can be received in exchange for it.
  9. Being able to walk around with money without holding it in one’s hand brings me back to the idea of the stone because, just like stone currency, there’s no need to be in physical possession of these Bitcoins to own them.
  10. We hear people talk about the American Dream, which requires that enough of these pieces of paper be accumulated to be financially stable. If one thinks about it deeply, it will be realized that these pieces of paper called money are received, and the whole life is based on them.
  11. Money is an adroit concept, and its pursuit lasts a lifetime. The goal from the moment one starts school is to join the game of making enough of these pieces of paper to make life more fun and acceptable.
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1 Response to 2nd person – Maxxpayne

  1. davidbdale's avatar davidbdale says:
    November 28, 2023 at 11:00 am

    These are fine, Maxx, and you’ve eliminated all the 2nd-person language. I hope you wouldn’t construct these sentences from scratch if you were not constrained by the weak structures of the originals. The use of “one” and the dependence on passive voice are sad substitutes for more robust writing. This doesn’t need a rewrite; it gets the assignment right, but it you ever have to choose between:

    So just remember the next time a bank statement is read or a dollar bill is looked at that an made-up value is being held. Without it, one might still be having to trade with goods like livestock and produce.

    and

    So just remember, bank statements and dollar bills represent only fictional value. Without it, we might still be trading cows for corn.

    I hope you’ll choose the second version.

    Reply

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